I was required to go to the Genetics Doctor twice a month in the beginning and then one to two times towards the end. This was difficult because not only was I seeing them but I also had to see my regular OBGYN and with all my doctors appointments it was hard, especially since I was receiving amino drains and having an almost 2 year old son. I was going to get my routine level 2 ultrasounds,when they noticed a blockage in Ashlynn's intestines, this is called Duodenal Atresia. I was informed that she would have to have surgery right after birth to fix the blockage so she could digest normally. And with this condition came a lot more complications with the pregnancy. This is were the amino drains came in, at least once every two weeks, I had to go and have the amino drained. I was measuring way ahead of what I should have.. When I was 27 weeks i was measuring at 37 weeks, you talking uncomfortable..LOL.. The drains did not hurt, they were uncomfortable and they caused me to be on bed rest for the next 5 days every time, which was inconvenient with an almost 2 year old. Not including they made me go into preterm labor more than once and I had to be hospitalized to stop the labor. And then the contractions started at 25 weeks, until I gave birth and it didn't help to be in pain when I had morning sickness everyday!!!! I couldn't wait for my baby girl to be born and for me to no longer be miserable, but I also knew that once she was out of my belly I could no longer protect her and then I would be struck with grief and depression all over. I was scared to death of not being able to protect her from people and surgery.. I didn't know which was worse to be pregnant and miserable or to have my daughter and not be able to protect her. At 29 weeks, they refused to do anymore amino drains because they were uncomfortable with the risk of her coming to soon. So here I was in the summer, being WAY bigger then I should, and feeling helpless and alone. I had planned for a VBAC (vaginal delivery after c-section), but the closer I came and the more doctors told me how unsafe it would be I planned a c-section. Ashlynn was born at 35 weeks and 4 days on July 14, 2010 at 1:49 p.m. And weighed in at 5lbs and 3ozs. I couldn't touch or hold her because they stuck a tube right down her little throat and put her in an incubator. They wheeled her beside me and I could hardly see her and I remember crying tears of joy when I heard her LOUD scream. I think that I had some hope that the test were wrong and all of this had just been a bad dream. But after recovery and heading to the NICU, I was face to face with this little angel , that had sandal-gaped toes, and beautiful big brown eyelashes, a head full of hair, and the biggest feet I have EVER seen on a baby. LOL, I remember thinking no wonder the child wouldn't stay out of my ribs, she couldn't with those things..LOL...Then came reality, the doctors confirmed her Downs diagnosis and I didn't care, all I seen was my daughter, MY beautiful baby girl! I didn't see a baby with Downs, I seen a baby who needed her mommy to love and care for her as I would my other child and future children. And then the next day came and I felt like everything around me was crumbling.
No comments:
Post a Comment